This was me... Could this be you?

Do you ever wonder how the hell you got so stuck?  The balance is all wrong? There’s not enough time to do the things you would like to?  You have a high expectation of yourself, yet ALWAYS put yourself last. Wishing it was Friday already and it’s only 7am on a Monday morning? Wishing, you’d had the balls to go for that job/promotion, but you didn’t, instead you’re sitting getting pissed off at things you feel are out of your control?  Feeling ‘conditioned’, losing the will to live, and wishing it was home time, only to do it all over again tomorrow? Feeling over worked, anxious, and under valued.  You have zero boundaries when it comes to work, but how after all these years do you start to get them back, without it looking like you’re not as committed as you once were?

Knowing you need to get home and spend some QT with the ones that really matter, that really love you, but you just can’t seem to get the balls to leave ON TIME!!!!!

Or how about this one…..

You’re packing the suitcase for your holiday, and thinking, WHY the hell did I not start my diet sooner?  Why did I not go to the gym?  I knew I had to, it was on my ‘to do list’ yet here I am 5 months down the line, and it’s another thing I didn’t do, instead, I worked longer hours every bloody night for my Boss, only to feel completely gutted when they didn’t even give me so much as a ‘thank you’.  I might as well be invisible.  Now here I am, ready to hit the beach, and feel like shit…. Stuff it, I’ll just hit the All Inclusive, enjoy the next 2 weeks and start again when I get back.  I definitely will, I swear, I’m definitely getting my shit together and making changes as soon as I get back.  I’m getting my priorities right, I’m definitely not putting myself through this again next year.  Aprox 12 months later…. De Ja Vous.

Why does everything take priority over you?

Do you go through your days feeling like you NEVER really put yourself first, you do everything for everyone else, and as a result, do very little for yourself.  Everyone around you thinks you have your shit together, and are in control.  As a result of this, you feel you need to keep up the persona.  How could you say you aren’t ok?  How could you lose face and actually tell them that the truth is, you may look like you are all over your shit, but inside you really aren’t that happy.  In fact, you don’t really like how you feel.

Suddenly you’re wondering where the last 3 years went?  Oh yeah, you wished them all away, every Monday morning remember?  Ring any bells?

 I was that girl, I have been where you are more times than I care to remember.  Conditioned to the point that I didn’t even recognise that girl I saw in the mirror anymore.  Plagued with insecurities about my abilities.  Stressed, anxious, full of fear, and wondering ‘ What on earth happened to that confident, young girl that had big dreams?’

My amazing Mum raised my sister and I to always believe we mattered.  She brought me up to be resilient, and understand that you need to work really hard in to make something of your life.  Coming from a single parent family, I can honestly say, I never missed out not having a Dad.  My Mum did the role of both, and did it so well.  Sometimes, when I’m trying to spin all the plates, and look after my 2 kids, I think ‘how the hell did my Mum do this on her own’?

I think back to when we were kids, everyone was in the same boat.  All the kids had the same, no one really had that much more than anyone else, and as kids we were all happy playing a game of rounders, and chap door run. 

Times have changed, and life has a different kind of pressure. 

Before we know it, we are on the hamster wheel, trying to buy our kids everything we never had, to void the gap that we don’t spend enough time with them. 

Every morning, I’d drive passed the school and nursery where I practically threw my kids in to, with a quick kiss goodbye, rushing to work for an early meeting or call, and wishing that I could really take my time with them, observe them going in, making sure they’re happy.  Wishing I could pick them up from school every day.  Wishing I had enough time.  Looking at other Mum’s and feeling jealous.  ‘Why can’t I do that’?

I witnessed so much politics and conditioning over the years in my jobs, that over time I too became so conditioned I didn’t even recognise myself anymore.  Constantly compared to others, never feeling that my best was ever enough, but to ashamed to speak up and say how I really felt.  ‘What if they thought less of me if I told them how much I was struggling’? I had a great job, with a good income, and my Mum was so proud of me.  How could I tell her, that inside I felt like I was suffocating.

Waking up at 4am soaked in sweat, was a new norm for me.  I was so uptight, anxious and with a self worth level of about zero.

While all of this was going on, my dear Mum was very ill with Cancer, so It made perfect sense that when the opportunity for me to take redundancy came up.

As I lay in bed in the hotel room, soaked in sweat, I looked at my phone... 4:16am ...NOT AGAIN! I'd taken redundancy from work and was having a break with Daryl and the boys in Tenerife. Why am I still waking up at this time, covered in sweat, racing heart? I should be celebrating the fact I'm on garden leave and get to have QT with my kids, yet I felt EXACTLY the same as I had done for the past 3 years.  Why was this anxiety and fear still there? What was wrong with me? I literally didn’t know what to do, I’d been so used to being controlled that I felt completely lost. 

I knew at that moment that something had to give, I knew that I didn’t want to go back to the Dr, as this time they were likely to put me on the ‘Happy Pills’ so after some real and honest soul searching, it was time to take some power and control back. 

 I fell in love with meditation, and started to really believe in, and love myself again.  I realised that putting myself first was one of the best things I could ever do.  In order for me to be truly happy, and fulfilled, I had to put myself first, and honour the gift I was given…. to serve others.

It was time to put on the big girls pants and take control of my life.  It was time to lift that pipe dream up off the shelf and make it a reality.  I owed it to myself, my family and for everyone else I was going to help in the future.

My absolute passion is to show people how to be the best version of themselves.  This came from me being the worst version of mine.

I am now living MY DREAM as certified and accredited Life Coach.  I specialise in Empowerment & Transformational Coaching.

I know what it feels like to be ‘stuck’, to ‘put on a front’ to pretend that ‘it doesn’t matter’  IT ABSOLUTLEY DOES MATTER, YOU MATTER… FACT!!!!

I work with my Clients to break down their limiting beliefs and show you that the only thing stopping you being the best version of yourself is guess what?....YOU!!

Having Coached/Managed and Mentored people for over 15 years in a stressful corporate world, I know what it takes to smash through those blocks that are stopping you. 

I work with Men and Women, and though our coaching sessions, I give you what you need to take your power back.  I want you to make more time for you, and will help you get there.

Within a few months, my Clients are now able to silence their inner critic, their ego, and are far more present and connected in their relationships.

They have achieved Goals they never imagined possible.

They’re living in abundance, and are grateful for every day of their life.

I can show you that you can have it all - That the only person stopping you IS YOU!!  I am living proof. 

I will show you that if you invest in yourself, work with me, and apply everything I give you, within 12 weeks you can be where you want to be.

You have a choice, everyone does

·        It's time to take back YOUR Power & Control.

·        Live in abundance.

·        Wake up and feel grateful.

·        Have a calmer mindset.  Be mindful, and be really present.

Now close your eyes and really feel your own 10/10 life.

Hold that thought and let me help you get there.....

Love & Gratitude,

Jill x